My son was less than a full day old when he demonstrated the bare essence to me of what boys are all about. Red and I were giving him a bath (the one right before the picture in the last post, in fact), and Red had put a washcloth across his boy business. I didn't realize immediately that she knew something I didn't, that being that it was not for sanitation, but for protection. I moved the washcloth, intending to scrub down his legs, and before Red could warn me, he whizzed all down the front of me from about 2' away. I was amazed.
And then there was yesterday, the Little Pirate's first day home. He'd had a messy diaper, and I was changing him. I'd gotten just to the point of hoisting feet in the air and cleaning off the butt with a wipe, and with the sort of loud irreverent noise that most teen boys congratulate one another for, he hosed a cone area to my right with a scattershot of flying poo. I was astounded, not just because of the volume, but the pressure. I've got to get him one of these if they still have them in baby sizes.
Red and I took the Little Pirate to see the pediatrician for a weight check this morning, and while in the car on the way, we had a very calm, rational discussion that went something like this:
"I'm hungry."
"Are you? You want to stop & get a latte or something before we get back to the house?"
"Yeah. Oh, hey, don't let me forget to ask the pediatrician when we're in there about the diarrhea (Little Pirate) has been having. I'm wondering if that's why he'd had that weight loss, he seems really gassy."
"Well, when you changed him this morning, was it dark greenish/black, or was it a mustard brownish-yellow? If it's a kind of yellow color, that's just him adjusting to eating breast milk."
"Oh, okay. Oh, here's the coffee stand."
-=laughing=- "You realize you're now officially a parent, right?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, we just talked about getting something to eat and the color and composition of poop in the same conversation,...and you didn't even blink. Congrats, Dad."
"I'm totally blogging that."
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1 comment:
Yep, it's official now.
Aren't the colors and textures of various baby poops amazing?
Hope the latte was good. When you start ordering guacamole while discussing baby poop you know you've really made it.
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